As my grown up life continues and I go to work and get paid and do grown up things like paying taxes, buying 1% milk and having meetings with my bank about mortgages. So keeping with this grown up theme I found myself in the older man chronicles, and dating an older man. “How much older?” I hear you ask! Well… let’s just say when he was in university I was probably still climbing trees but definitely out of diapers, promise.
So what are the perks of dating an older guy? Apart from the Seniors Discount of course.
Until a couple of months ago I was just another graduate messhead; traveling when I could and making ends meet. So my dating circle consisted of students or other messheads. I grew tired of feeling dating was sometimes babysitting them as well. Helping them sort out their lives when I could barely make heads nor tails of mine. I was tired of being with the guy spent his spare time learning Japanese instead of looking for a job. Or waiting until the universe decides it didn’t give him a fair deal and give him a pay rise, based on karma and not hard work, which wouldn’t work either because he didn't have good karma and spent his time at work spending me compromising photos of himself in different parts of the office.
So it’s nice to date someone who has a life. I mean a proper real life, a career, who has failed, achieved and built a life and a future.
You never find yourself creeping around to not be heard by parents/siblings/house mates. I have smuggled a fair few people out of my house when I shared with three other girls (they always found out) and I’ve had to sneak around when dating men (boys?) who still lived at home. However much they claim, it’s not as exciting as a spy TV show and in the end no one benefits from being quiet.
There is always wine. And I do like wine. Wherever we go, and whatever we do there is always (red) wine involved. It’s a lifestyle I can get used to. (Or burgeoning alcoholism I will have to care for). Students tend to only be able to afford Sainsburys Basics vodka (which from experience, I don’t need to experience ever again).
We get to do cool stuff. Ok, ok, older guys can’t have all the credit for this one. You get up to some crazy stuff whatever your age as long as you have an imagination, but it’s nice to spend a Tuesday night schmoozing with some cool Hollywood costume designer instead of sitting in front of the telly in your pants. As a student sometimes you get into that same old, same old routine and your relationship loses its “spark” when you spend all day together playing Xbox or pretending to go to Uni. When you have to have a proper separate life from the other half you try to make that time together special. At least sometimes.
When I was a student and I dated someone with a job, I never understood why I couldn’t have as much attention as when I dated someone who was also a student. I didn’t understand why the world didn’t revolve around me. But now as a fully fledged “real person” (who refers to themselves as a ‘real person’) I understand that SHOCK HORROR there are other priorities in life than whether or not he has text me back quick enough.
But never fear, in case the older man is not for you… The well rounded gentleman of 30 plus could just be the douchebag of 24. Be patient. Some leopards do change their spots. But if he’s wearing a fake leather jacket I say pack it in right now.